Monday, May 10, 2010


I didn't want to come back and write, especially regarding things which have become indistinct to my sight and senses. I chose to feel numb to avoid anger seeping in. "That's the best way to go about it..." I said to my other half. We were both sitting on the bed cross legged folding clothes and making bomb grenades out of the kids' underwear before launching them into the air for them to catch and keep in their drawers. The bed, 14 years of age seems to be all bumpy and thorny with the spring iron sprouting out of the socket as a result of the kids constantly turning it into a trampoline. And no matter how many layers of bed spread and sheets were gathered on it, the pestering bulge would insist to pierce our beings.

I am a strong person, I would like to think that I am. But my strength collapsed the moment I gazed into my other half's deep eyes every time he felt as though he has failed me. " has been a long time now, and I haven't been bringing any good news to tell you" he fussed. We were still meddling with the clothes, folding each one in our own different style. I looked at him and tasted his pain, the same pain that has been hemmed in for the longest of time. I said what I always say to him, ..." Tak per sayang, we'll figure this out k, something good awaits us, one day, someday insyaAllah, ...sikit je lagi k, kita doa byk2 k." He just smiled, unwavered by my feeble attempt of assurance.

We remained silent, busy with our own occupied thoughts. The silence stayed firm in this bubble of ours and never once left the room, unheard by the other occupants in the house. That's the way it should be, that's how we wanted it, until that one day, that someday emerges from the thorny surface. Yes, until.

We'll figure this out sama-sama k Liebling. Saya ada kan?


You can go.

You can start all over again

You can try to find a way to make another day go by

You can hide

Hold all your feelings inside

You can try to carry on when all you want to do is cry

[Chorus:]And maybe somedayWe'll figure all this out

Try to put an end to all our doubt

Try to find a way to make things better now and

Maybe someday we'll live our lives out loud

We'll be better off somehowSomeday

Now waitAnd try to find another mistake

If you throw it all away then maybe you can change your mind

You can run, oh

And when everything is over and done

You can shine a little light on everything around youMan it's good to be someone

[Chorus]And I don't want to waitI just want to know

I just want to hear you tell me so

Give it to me straight

Tell it to me slow

Cause maybe someday

We'll figure all this out

We'll put an end to all our doubt

Try to find a way to just feel better now

andMaybe someday we'll live our lives out loud

We'll be better off somehowSomeday[x2]

Cause sometimes we don't really notice

Just how good it can get

So maybe we should start all over

Start all over again

Thanks so much Vivien and Mai!

2 treats:

Kitchen Guardian said...

wiz, kita kena hv a looong chat..pasai apa pulak ni! the green cake is out of the world punya cantik!

JulesMD said...

hi wiz, i buat standing order je lah now : that all wiz's cakes are gorgeous! standing order ni takde definite deadline ya, it's ongoing sampai bila2... :)... i'm not wise or anything, boleh hidup je la, camtu; but i can say that life is like a yo-yo, dia naik turun naik turun. masa kat atas nak turun bawah tu senang, tapi masa kat bawah nak naik atas tu kenalah lebih skit push, coz if tak cukup push dia tak naik tinggi balik. but sometimes kita kena tunggu lama skit kat bawah tu, to gather enough momentum so we can push harder to go up higher... life's like that lah. as for me, kengkdg i enjoy jugak to spend more time kat bawah, sambil layan lagu2 jiwang yg menyayat hati dan menyentuh kalbu... then dah habih layan tu, celik mata, lompat lah balik! so, nanti lepas ni u lompat lebih tinggi ek? coming soon ya, soon... :)