You know... that time when you were small but big enough to remember, when the longkang in front of your house was too huge for your tiny stepsoooo myk kali jatuh in that longkang and when your fears were centered around your brothers' mischief as well as the countless spelling and dictation tests at school? Yes, Primary school time... when you were often questioned of your ambitions, ambitions and ambitions!
I remembered answering my teacher enthusiastically of what I wanted to be. The first 8 times at least. And at each time, I answered differently, oblivious to the previous answer I had supplied her. And there was a time when it came to a point of just shrugging or moving my shoulders upwards to show indifference towards the question before concluding it(after much persuasion) with a tepid answer of being a teacher. Most girls in my class jotted down the same answer, it was the second most popular, the most popular was air stewardess. The most ambitious of the lot would have the blank scribbled with lawyer, doctor, engineer or architect, but never a businesswoman, a homemaker, a designer, a baker.
But kids in this era are simply creative with their ambitions, my kids specifically. Both my children wanted to be astronauts for quite sometime. When they grew out of the idea, they toiled with ideas fed by the TV. My daughter felt that she should be an opera singer before realizing that she would nicely fit as a writer. My son's ambitions too camouflaged with the series of visuals flashed on tv. It was a rock star at one point, an ustadz, a baker, a soldier and the latest is a truck driver or F1 driver, taxi driver, any type of driver la, as long as he gets to be behind the wheels. If only I could say,"... be what you want to be children as long as the kerja is halal and you are happy with it." I wish I could be that supportive, but truthfully, I am only human, a mother with her own sets of ambitions for her children, just in case they go astray. But I pray so hard that they wouldn't and I would be happy for whatever they are passionate about as long as it is in the guideline of our religion. I worry...naturally, only befitting of a mother.
...it will just have to be que sera sera for now.